Women on men

Women on men

If you kiss him, you are easy
If you don't, you are frigid
If you praise him, he thinks you are fake
If you don't, he thinks you are ungrateful

If you agree to all his likes, you are submissive
If you don't, you are a queen controlling him
If you visit him often, he thinks you're desperate
If you don't, you're not interested

If you are jealous, he says you're possessive
If you don't, he fools around
If you attempt a romance, he says you are cheap
If you don't, he thinks you are cold

If you are a minute late, he says you are fussy
If he is late, he says you're impatient
If you visit another man, you're fooling around
If he is visited by another woman, "Oh, we're just friends"

If you kiss him once in a while, he says you're too shy
If you kiss him too often, he says you're too forward

If he fails to help you in crossing the street, he brings up the
feminist movement
If he does, he expects to be rewarded

If you stare at another woman, he says you're jealous
If he is stared at by other men, boy, you're in big trouble
If you talk, it's always too much
If you listen, it's never enough

In short:
So complex, yet so predictable
So macho, yet so sensitive
So confusing, yet so funny
But most of all, so irritating, yet so irresistible