Saturday, June 30
Friday, June 29
CATS Vs DOGS
Cats Vs. Dogs
What is a Cat?
1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.
4. They whine when they are not happy.
5. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
6. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
8. They're moody.
9. They leave hair everywhere.
10. They drive you nuts and cost an arm and a leg.
Conclusion: They're tiny women in little fur coats.
* * *
What is a Dog?
1. Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most comfortable
piece of furniture in the house.
2. They can hear a package of food opening half a block away,
but don't hear you when you're in the same room.
3. They can look dumb and lovable all at the same time.
4. They growl when they are not happy.
5. When you want to play, they want to play.
6. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7. They are great at begging.
8. They will love you forever if you rub their tummies.
9. They leave their toys everywhere.
10. They do disgusting things with their mouths and then try to
give you a kiss.
Conclusion: They're tiny men in little fur coats.
Thursday, June 28
Wednesday, June 27
How to Tell the Sex of a Fly
How to Tell the Sex of a Fly
JUST TOO CUTE.
woman walked into the kitchen to find herhusband stalking around with a fly swatter"What are you doing?"She asked."Hunting Flies"He responded."Oh. ! Killing any?"She asked."Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell them apart?"
He responded,"3 were on a beer can,2 were on the phone.
Tuesday, June 26
Saturday, June 23
Award
Oh thank you all so very much. I would like to thank the academy..I mean shiners, for this award. It has taken many years and hard work to achieve my goal. I will treasure this award and keep it in the appropriate spot in my house. (You can remove the camera now Pablo!!!! ) ROFLMAO
Friday, June 22
Thursday, June 21
Interesting observation !!!
1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.
2 The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING
3 The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.
4 The sport of choice for supervisorsis BASEBALL.
5 The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS
6 The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is GOLF.
THE AMAZING CONCLUSION:
The higher you go in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
Wednesday, June 20
Tuesday, June 19
men
Time for some male bashing..... (For a change)
Q: What is the difference between men and puppies?
A: Puppies grow up.
Q: Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces?
A: Because they are...
Q: What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.
Q: If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit the ground first?
A: Who cares?????.. ...(both are equally dense!!)
Q: What did God say after he created man?
A: I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!! (Yea)
Q: What's the difference between an intelligent man & a UFO?
A: I don't know, I've never seen either.
Q: What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
A: i) no mind ii) no business
Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A:! Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions ..LOL!!!
Q: What is the difference between men and pigs?
A: Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...
Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A: The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention of driving.
Q: What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift?
A: Exchange him!!
Q: Why do men like smart women?
A: Opposites attract.
Pass this on to some women who need a laugh..
And to men who can handle it!
Happy B-day Karkey
| Your Birthdate: June 19 |
 Your strength: Well developed stability and confidence Your weakness: Suspicion of others Your power color: Eggplant Your power symbol: Spade Your power month: October |
What Does Your Birth Date Mean?
TODAY'S BIRTHDAYS
1566 - James I Stuart (King of Scotland)
1834 - Edgar Degas (French Painter, Ballerinas)
1896 - Bessie Wallis Warfield Simpson (Duchess of Windsor)
1902 - Guy Lombardo (Orchestra Leader, Auld Lang Syne)
1934 - Gena Rowlands (Actress, Gloria)
1942 - Elaine "Spanky" McFarlane (Singer)
1948 - Phylicia Rashad (Actress)
1954 - Kathleen Turner (Actress)
1956 - Doug Stone (Singer)
1962 - Paula Abdul (Singer/Judge)
1974 - Bumper Robinson (Actor)
1975 - Poppy Montgomery (Actress)
1978 - Dirk Nowitzki (NBA Forward)
1978 - Garfield (Cartoon Cat)
Sunday, June 17
E-Proverbs for the 21st Century
E-Proverbs for the 21st Century
1 Home is where you hang your @.
2 The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.
3 A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click
4 You can't teach a new mouse old clicks
5 Great groups from little icons grow.
6 Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.
7 C:\ is the root of all directories.
8 Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice.
9 Pentium wise, pen and paper foolish.
10 The modem is the message
11 Too many clicks spoil the browse.
12 The geek shall inherit the earth.
13 There's no place like home page.
14 Don't byte off more than you can view.
15 Fax is stranger than fiction
16 What boots up must come down.
17 Windows will never cease.
18 Virtual reality is its own reward.
19 Modulation in all things
20 Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him to use the Net
and he won't bother
Saturday, June 16
Kiss
*Kiss on the Stomach --- "Lets have sex"
*Kiss on the Forehead --- "Forever you will be mine"
*Kiss on the Ear --- "I'm horny"
*Kiss on the Cheek --- "We're friends"
*Kiss on the Hand --- "I adore you"
*Kiss on the Neck --- "We belong together"
*Kiss on the Shoulder --- "I want you"
*Kiss on the Lips --- "I love you" OR "I want you"
What the gesture means...
*Holding Hands --- "We can learn to love each other"
*Slap on the Butt --- "That's mine"
*Playing with the Ear --- "I can't live without you"
*Holding on tight --- "Don't let go"
*Looking into each other's Eyes --- "Don't leave me"
*Playing with Hair on Head --- "Tell me you love me"
*Arms around the Waist --- "I love you too much to let go"
*Laughing while Kissing --- "I am completely comfortable with you"
--Advice-- * Don't ask for a kiss, take one.
*If you were thinking about someone while reading this, you're definitely in Love.
--Requirements- - *Post this again after reading!! Or you will have a bad year of Relationships.
If you LIKE, LOVE, OR MISS someone right now and can't get them out of your head then Re-post this within One Minute and Whoever you are missing will surprise you. Repost this as "What a kiss means".
Friday, June 15
CHURCH SIGNS
15 Hilarious Church Signs
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Wednesday, June 13
Monday, June 11
Sunday, June 10
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